Who invented that thing anyway?
I just love how Microsoft insists on using the progress bar in Windows, even though it hasn't correctly indicated progress for a decade or so. Don't you love the feeling you get when that stupid thing finally fills up, and then decides to start over again? And don't try to tell me that the most recent version works much better now. I've been hearing THAT line since Windows 98 came out. It's still crap. Why can't my computer just be honest with me?
Speaking of BS, here's some I saw in my inbox today. It was a spam email with the subject “Your Ebook has just shipped”. Time to update my spam filters, I guess. Of course I didn't open it, I'm not a complete moron. But it caught my attention because at first it struck me as pure digital stupidity. Why would anyone write an email, a form of advertising already distrusted by millions, with a subject line that reeks of spam? Out of irritated curiosity, I almost emailed this wannabe con man back to see if I could get their response rate. Then maybe throw in a crack about negative numbers being possible answers.
But then I saw the genius of it. See, the best thing you can get for whatever scam you're running would be stupid people. To a scam artist, stupid people are worth their weight in gold. I didn't think of it because for the rest of us, idiots are worth their weight in air. Unless you need amusement, or are drunk enough to find them witty.
So, you write an email to attract the slower internet users out there, because it's easier to scam them. I get it now. That's why this person wrote an email that claimed that an Ebook needed to be shipped- despite the fact that shipping an ebook costs money and email attachments are free. This obvious flaw in logic weeds out anyone with a brain. While the more gullible members of the community respond, to get their tracking number or whatever. That leaves the con artist free to jingle keys as a distraction from whatever scam they're selling this week. Hmmm I better stop with this line of thought. This is something easy that's illegal, profitable, and I could do it well. And that has got to be the worst combination possible for me.
A letter I wrote to encourage members of the legal profession